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k700
Power Member
Joined: 27 Aug 2005
Posts: 146
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 Posted: Thu Sep 14, 2006 12:11 am Post subject: Bill Gates Is Dead |
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In 2050 A.D. Bill Gates died in a car accident. He found himself in Purgatory being sized up by God... "Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call.
I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in the world and yet you created that ghastly Windows 95. I'm going to do something I've never done before. In your case, I'm going to let you decide where you want to go!"
Bill replied, "Well, thanks, God. What's the difference between the two?"
God said, "I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly if it will help you make a decision."
"Fine, but where should I go first?"
God said, "I'm going to leave that up to you."
Bill said, "OK, then, let's try Hell first."
So Bill went to Hell. It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters.
There were thousands of beautiful women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining, the temperature was perfect. Bill was very pleased.
"This is great!" he told God. "If this is Hell, I REALLY want to see Heaven!"
"Fine," said God and off they went. Heaven was a high place in the clouds, with angels drifting about playing harps and singing. It was nice but not as enticing as Hell. Bill thought for a quick minute and rendered his decision.
"Hmm, I think I prefer Hell" he told God.
"Fine," retorted God, "as you desire."
So Bill Gates went to Hell.
Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to see how he was doing in Hell. When God arrived in Hell, he found Bill shackled to a wall, screaming amongst the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being burned and tortured by demons.
"How's everything going, Bill?" God asked.
Bill responded -- his voice full of anguish and disappointment, "This is awful, this is not what I expected. I can't believe this happened. What happened to that other place with the beaches and the beautiful women playing in the water?"
God smiled and said, "That was the screen saver." |
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| Posted: Thu Sep 14, 2006 12:11 am Post subject: Recommendation: Auction Selling 101 |
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2digits
Contributor
Joined: 28 Sep 2006
Posts: 6
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| Posted: Mon Oct 09, 2006 9:30 am Post subject: |
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Hehe that was a good one :D First I thought he really had died. Hmm yeah  |
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fpforum
Contributor
Joined: 18 Nov 2006
Posts: 5
Location: USA
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| Posted: Sat Nov 18, 2006 12:57 am Post subject: |
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| haven't heard that one before..lol..i like it |
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sausage
Member
Joined: 23 Sep 2006
Posts: 60
Location: www.greatlumley.com
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| Posted: Mon Nov 27, 2006 9:09 pm Post subject: |
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vgt
Contributor
Joined: 15 Feb 2007
Posts: 10
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| Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 12:10 am Post subject: |
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| ha ha ha... That's a funny one, thanks for sharing...ha ha ha ha ha... |
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jimcass
Contributor
Joined: 17 Mar 2007
Posts: 6
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| Posted: Sat Mar 17, 2007 2:43 pm Post subject: |
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| LOL. Bill Gates is my hero! |
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theimpco
Contributor
Joined: 22 Mar 2007
Posts: 12
Location: California
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| Posted: Thu Mar 22, 2007 11:27 pm Post subject: Re: Bill Gates Is Dead |
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True enough
| k700 wrote: | In 2050 A.D. Bill Gates died in a car accident. He found himself in Purgatory being sized up by God... "Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call.
I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in the world and yet you created that ghastly Windows 95. I'm going to do something I've never done before. In your case, I'm going to let you decide where you want to go!"
Bill replied, "Well, thanks, God. What's the difference between the two?"
God said, "I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly if it will help you make a decision."
"Fine, but where should I go first?"
God said, "I'm going to leave that up to you."
Bill said, "OK, then, let's try Hell first."
So Bill went to Hell. It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters.
There were thousands of beautiful women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining, the temperature was perfect. Bill was very pleased.
"This is great!" he told God. "If this is Hell, I REALLY want to see Heaven!"
"Fine," said God and off they went. Heaven was a high place in the clouds, with angels drifting about playing harps and singing. It was nice but not as enticing as Hell. Bill thought for a quick minute and rendered his decision.
"Hmm, I think I prefer Hell" he told God.
"Fine," retorted God, "as you desire."
So Bill Gates went to Hell.
Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to see how he was doing in Hell. When God arrived in Hell, he found Bill shackled to a wall, screaming amongst the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being burned and tortured by demons.
"How's everything going, Bill?" God asked.
Bill responded -- his voice full of anguish and disappointment, "This is awful, this is not what I expected. I can't believe this happened. What happened to that other place with the beaches and the beautiful women playing in the water?"
God smiled and said, "That was the screen saver." |
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power3star
Just Registered
Joined: 10 Jul 2007
Posts: 4
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| Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2007 7:30 pm Post subject: |
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Ho that was funny thanks for sharing. At first I thought Bill might be dead then I remeber it wasn't in the papper this morning
What a deal! k700 You a writer? |
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dhavard
Contributor
Joined: 13 Jul 2007
Posts: 5
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| Posted: Fri Jul 13, 2007 4:14 pm Post subject: |
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| lol |
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chrisebay
Just Registered
Joined: 30 Oct 2007
Posts: 4
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| Posted: Tue Oct 30, 2007 6:27 am Post subject: |
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| does Zuckerman replace bill gates? |
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pepsiD
Just Registered
Joined: 16 Dec 2007
Posts: 4
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| Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2007 12:46 pm Post subject: |
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| lmao |
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chinchillables
Contributor
Joined: 25 May 2008
Posts: 10
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| Posted: Sun May 25, 2008 4:48 am Post subject: |
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| LOL, ya'll silly. |
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dekadent30
Just Registered
Joined: 12 Aug 2008
Posts: 3
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| Posted: Tue Aug 12, 2008 6:13 pm Post subject: |
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| i don't like bill, good for him |
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